Archives for January 2019

It’s not just celebrities, politicians, or YouTube stars, who are public figures. We all are.

Why? Because the context we live in is one of public interaction. When we intersect with another person, we are public. When we are in the line of sight of a child, we are public. When we post anything online, we are public.

So why not act like it? We can all be the people we’d want to look up to. We can all be sharing the ideas that we think will change the world for the better.

We might think that what we do doesn’t have a lot of impact. Our own perspective doesn’t actually matter. What matters is that we know our presence and actions have impact. The scale is not important. The actual impact is.

Burning out is real, and it stinks.

One of the harsher consequences of burn out is the distorted view of all aspects of life. Everything begins to lose its value. There’s no capacity for even the receiving of care. No one can help, no one can do anything, right? Only the burden of whatever has been carried matters. And it weighs heavy.

Burn out is real, and we can get caught in it. But situations change, and corners are turned. In the midst of the pain, we would do well to keep our eyes open for the shift. The friend that wants to support us, the new boss who actually cares, the opportunity we’ve actually been waiting fore. They may be right in front of us.

Just as love may blind us to the bad we see, burn out can blind us to any good that crosses our path.

(and get some rest!)

A piece of technology? An invention? A new art form?

In the world of tap dance, maybe the first time someone put metal on the bottom of their shoes and called them taps it was new. After that it’s just a variation on a theme.

Maybe, the first time some one hit the floor with their feet and called it making music it was new. After that it’s just a variation on a particular form of expression.

Forms are important. They give us context. Innovation is important, too. It provides vibrancy, relevance, and intrigue. But innovation isn’t the only thing that does that. Variation does as well. Look at all the voices in the visual arts world, in the world of music, or in the world of dance. Many voices, much variation, singular forms.

We live in a world that idolizes innovators, to the degree that the value of variation is diminished. Sad. For many innovators stand on the top of a mountain built by accumulated contributions – a multitude of variations. We would do well to celebrate all of it.

Don’t bring your baggage to the children. They don’t need to carry it.

Don’t bring your pain to the kids. They don’t need to feel it.

Don’t bring your exploitation to the kids. They don’t need to be a part of it.

Bring your solutions. They need to see them.

Bring your awesome work ethic. They need to learn it.

Bring your peace and grace. They need to experience it.

The world has enough in it that attempts to derail the lives of children.

Don’t take part in it, at least not in front of the kids.

It’s doesn’t matter how experienced you are, how many times you’ve done something, or how well you’ve done something before, take the time to warm up.

For dancers (and athletes of all levels) this is especially true, as our bodies change daily. But for all of us the ethic of warming up is a good one to keep. No need to jump right into anything. Take a few minutes to check in with yourself, those around you, and the situation itself.

But what if we don’t have time? Find it…at the beginning of the day, in the middle, or at the end. Warm ups can happen hours before we need to perform, and throughout the day. We can be getting ready wherever we are, so that when the time comes (and we often don’t know when that will be) we would have been prepared.

So, what kind of warm up can you have in your day?

There’s something to be said about saying what you mean. Clearly, and without strategy. If you mean to say yes, say yes. If you mean to say no, say no. If you need more information before making a choice, say so. If you want to learn, ask to be taught. If you don’t know something, say, “I don’t know.” You are no more or less of a person for saying so. You’re just being honest.

Your words will resonate with others who recognize honesty. You’ll provide a space where people have to be less on guard than when they talk to others. You’ll be saving their energy. This all really boils down to one thing: being honest. Let your yes be yes and your no be no. Nothing more, nothing less.

I’ve noticed there are at least two types of people in the world. One attempts to reconcile all things, resolve all disputes, bring peace to all situations. The other likes to get things started, see people hash it out, and stir the pot – so to speak.

While I personally would probably land in the former, I don’t mind the existence of the latter group – with one BIG caveat. If your going to the stir pot please don’t do it just for your entertainment (which I’ve seen happen). Others are watching and people’s emotions likely will get involved. You actually have no control over the outcome of what it is you’ve started, and so saying it’s “just for fun” or “no one is going to get hurt” are actually lies.

No, if you’re going to stir the pot, do it with purpose. Use it as an exercise in teaching people how to have civil conversations, or as a way to move towards a solution around a given issue. Otherwise you’re just adding to the noise, and there is quite enough of that already.

When it comes to time and resources we often think of giving and receiving. Some of us have received a lot. Some of us have given a lot. We often hear the idea of “giving back” which to my ears assumes the idea that you’ve taken something that you then need to give back.

Either way I’ve been thinking about the idea of sharing. What if the resources people already had access to, easily flowed through the interpersonal relationships that bound them in community, moving towards the areas of need or potential?

I think it’s possible, but at least two things have to happen. First, the idea of ownership of the resource needs to end (or at least diminish). Responsibility towards a resource is different than ownership. We are responsible (able to respond) to the resources we have access to, but we actually don’t own the resource itself.

Second, we have to be looking to give, and able to receive without consequence. Example: Just because I’m a generous giver doesn’t make me a better person. Just because I’ve received a lot doesn’t make me needy or special. Being the giver or receiver should not change the nature of the relationship between the people. It often does, but it shouldn’t.

What would it look like if we held all we were given with an open hand? What if we looked for opportunities to give and to receive. I suspect the world would be a different place.